Difficult to Watch

April 27, 2006 / by hopefields

I took the kids and went to visit my mother this afternoon. As she sat there in her wheelchair and fidgeted with her blanket, I noticed how frail she had become. This is the same woman that was always stubborn and abusive, in my childhood. This is the same woman that was such a terribly mean drunk. Yet, now she is frail and fragile. She doesn't always recognize us or make any sense when she talks. As I watched her, I realized that I truly love her and my heart is breaking for her at this time. The reason is because she never needed any help, for as long as I can remember. She never showed or exhibited any signs of weakness or fragility -- until now. And I know that while it is difficult for me, it must be truly difficult for her. All I know is that she is my mother and I love her...I didn't know a person's heart could break as many times as mine has, since the beginning of this journey with my mother.

3 comments on Difficult to Watch

  • ChihulahuaLover said 2 years ago
    I am so sorry Hope.[HEART][SAD] I remember my Dad looking so fragile and going through a LOT of these things with him in the hospital and nursing home. He went from a man who weighed about 175 pounds and 6 foot tall to a fragile 80 pounds. It is so hard to watch. My thoughts and prayers are with you my friend.[HEART]

    Jenn[SAD]
  • unlimited said 2 years ago
    Hope,
    You are not alone. Besides my ministry I take care of everything for two over eighty year old parents. It is a challenge. Hang in there![THUMBUP]
  • chatty said 2 years ago
    i truly understand how you feel , much like you my parents drank and they fought each other for years , god help anyone who got in thire fights . we would call the police and the two of my parents would stand ordering the police off the door steps my mom passed over her liver from the drink, before she lost her mind somewhatbut my dad cared for her as we did .all i can say is life is a lesson in itself .drinking can become an illness and it will kill you but you sound like me you remember but your love for your mom will take care of her till the final days and i wish my mom was here today because i stayed with her helping to dress her ,feed her ,and i would do it all over again as im sure you would
    you sound like a big hearted woman your mom is lucky , it sounds like you forgave her
    [SMILE][HEART][THUMBUP]

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